KCBiker.com Jokes

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18. The Origins of Jesus

Scholars have long debated the exact ethnicity and nationality of Jesus. Recently, at a theological meeting in Rome, scholars had a heated debate on this subject. One by one, they offered their evidence........

• THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS MEXICAN:
  1. His first name was Jesus
  2. He was bilingual
  3. He was always being harassed by the authorities
• But then there were equally good arguments that.... JESUS WAS BLACK:
  1. He called everybody "brother"
  2. He liked Gospel
  3. He couldn't get a fair trial
• But then there were equally good arguments that.... JESUS WAS JEWISH:
  1. He went into His Father's business
  2. He lived at home until he was 33
  3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin,and his Mother was sure he was God
• But then there were equally good arguments that.... JESUS WAS ITALIAN:
  1. He talked with his hands
  2. He had wine with every meal
  3. He used olive oil
• But then there were equally good arguments that.... JESUS WAS CALIFORNIAN:
  1. He never cut his hair
  2. He walked around barefoot
  3. He started a new religion
• But then there were equally good arguments that.... JESUS WAS IRISH:
  1. He never got married
  2. He was always telling stories
  3. He loved green pastures
• But perhaps the most compelling evidence..... THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS A WOMAN:
  1. He had to feed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food
  2. He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it
  3. Even when He was dead, He had to getup because there was more work to do.....

19.  Wrong place, wrong time: strange but true story from www.darwinawards.com

A man tried to commit a robbery in Renton, WA. This was probably his first attempt, as suggested by the fact that he had no previous record of violent crime, and by his terminally stupid choices as listed below:

1. The target was H & J Leather & Firearms, a gun shop.
2. The shop was full of customers, in a state where a substantial portion of the adult population is licensed to carry concealed handguns in public places.
3. To enter the shop, he had to step around a marked Police patrol car parked at the front door.
4. An officer in uniform was standing next to the counter, having coffee before reporting to duty.

20.  Happy Butt

It was this little girl's first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, "Happy Butt." The teacher said, "Honey I don't think that's your name. You need to go to the principal's office and get this straightened out." So she went to the principal's office.

So the principal asked, "What's your name?" The little girl said, Happy Butt." The principal called the girl's mother to get this straightened out once and for all. After getting off the phone he looked at the little girl and said, "Honey, your name's is Gladys, not Happy Butt." The girl then exclaimed, "Glad Ass, Happy Butt" what's the difference?

21.  Uh-oh!

22.  Born to be wild

23.  Political commentary

24.  Commentary